All The Flair Of A Filing Cabinet by Jacob Karnas

Please visit my satire column ALL THE FLAIR OF A FILING CABINET... here.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Gimel

It's been raining all day and night. I love when it rains. The only time I find I can write quality material is when it is overcast yet I don't find myself in a particularly creative mood at the moment.

I've been having a great time at work as of late [knock on wood] and I hope that after the "holiday season" it remains that way. Cheyne, Anne and Brisa have all returned to work for Borders and I've been having a great time with them and the other members of the staff. The season has brought out a sense of familiarity in Brian and Nico. They've included me in the inside "holiday jokes" and I feel as though I had been there to see it firsthand last year.

I've been employed with Borders for nearly a year now, having been hired just after the season ended in 2006. I'm the fastest cashier on staff and ring, second to Sage in the cafe, the most customers in the district. The fate of the store's Borders Rewards Card numbers rest on Sage and me alone, and so far I have a higher percentage than he does [again, knock on wood].

I've been doing an exemplary job with my work and the managers have seemed to show interest in it. My work at the kiosk is especially exemplary and I'm hoping that Tim puts in a good word to the managers for me on that note.

I've been working on getting ready for my "campaign for president 2008", a YouTube series telling voters who don't know who to vote for to pencil my name in on the ballots next year.

There are other shorts in the beginning stages, including: "FlatMates", "Conversations" and "Suits". Look for upcoming updates on all four.

In other news: I need a girlfriend... I hate being alone.

Yet that's rife with self-pity, so none of that.

- JWK

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